So Tough to Tame by Victoria Dahl

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

Very hot book. Like, super hot. I don't like to do spoilers, and I'm hardly a prude, but I have to say that there is one particular sex scene that is even more raunchy than normal in contemporary romance. It's the thing that nice girls never do ;) It was so interesting that I read my first such scene here in 2013 when its probably been going on since the time of the Greeks and the Kama Sutra. I wonder if this is the beginning of some new trend...Well kudos to Ms. Dahl for pushing the envelope in such a matter of fact way.

I thought this was generally a good read. I didn't love it as much as the others of Ms. Dahl's contemporaries (but to be fair, those were phenomenal) because I thought there wasn't enough real mental connection between the H and h. I mean, yes they had known each other since childhood, and yes they are attracted to one another, and yes they are both nice, kind people, but I didn't feel the reason they were the One for one another. 

Here's the 2-minute summary - 
He: A nice and easygoing cowboy who likes his simple life with horses and people and doesn't really need the complication of a life with too much ambition.

She: A woman who has come home to rebuild her life after a terrible scandal that ruined her professional and personal reputation. She was a security specialist in Las Vegas who got tied up in some bad business (not of her own doing) and spent all her savings trying to defend herself against the accusations. She was acquitted of professional wrongdoing but people keep bringing it back up and she knows she can't afford anything going wrong.

Conflict: They had been friends as kids. In fact, she had tutored him when they had been younger, and knows that he has a learning disability that slowed him down in school work - but not with the girls in high school. She rolls back into town and sees at once that his flirting days are far from behind him and decides, what the heck, she never had a chance with him when they were kids, but she certainly has one with him now. She's more confident and worldly and just goes for it. He's into it, but also harbors the life long insecurity of feeling dumb and inferior. Especially when it comes to her - she of all people, knows exactly how "dumb" he is. The conflict is mainly him working through his inferiority issues so he feels like he is "worthy" of someone like her.

And Then He Kissed Her by Laura Lee Guhrke

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

Hmmm... I am not really sure what to say about this book except that it wasn't really my cup of tea. Maybe if I liked really boring tea...Well, no. That's not entirely fair. There is ONE interesting thing about this book at that is the fact that it is set in 1890s England - a really interesting time - well after the Regency period, late into the repressive Victorian era, and right before "Modern" Britain. Change was afoot and some of that change was reflected in this book. 

Economically, Britain was booming - there were the Railways, international trade and imperialism; even telephones and electric lights in some households. Culturally, women had a smidge more options. The heroine of this story, the delightfully Victorian-ly named Emmaline Dove, for example worked for a living as a secretary. She had independence and respectability and although she lived modestly, she wasn't in the kind of desperate circumstances of any of the unmarried, un-dowered Austen heroines of the Regency.

Sexually however, the Victorian period was a bleak time for ladies. Not that any time in the past seems to have been particularly breezy for women, but the Victorians seemed to take special delight in removing any thought of pleasure or fun for the fairer sex. Like a good Victorian lady, Emma, begins as a rather mousy sex-less creature, who is taught early on by her aunt to suppress any baser instincts. 

Aside: Recall that this was a time that sexual frustration in women was referred to as "hysterical mania" to be treated by doctors providing "pelvic massage" to induce "hysterical paroxism" in order to relieve the patients hysterical symptoms. 

Another aside: There was this lovely movie called "Hysteria" (trailer below) that I watched a while back starring Hugh Dancy and Maggie Gyllenhaal which tells the story of Dr. Joseph Mortimer's 1880s invention of the electromechanical vibrator. The hilarious-but-also-kinda-sad reason for mechanizing the vibrator was basically because the good Doctor Mortimer's wrists starting hurting from giving so many women pelvic massages that he needed good old technology to help a brother out. The obvious question arises - how the hell many massages was this guy giving anyway? Can you get carpal tunnel from too many pelvic massages? Have All the Women been informed? Because it seems like that would be information ladies would like to have.

I seem to have digressed far, far off the garden path. 

Anyway, my POINT is, that while this story was incredibly tiresomely AND pedantically dull, it was set in a cool period in history.

I should outline the He/Her/Conflict of the book so at least you have all the facts to decide for yourselves:

He: Viscount Marlowe, or Harry, is one of the modern haute ton who actually works for a living. This was a time when the aristocracy was broke and had to either marry rich American heiress (Downton Abbey, Season 4 Coming Soon, what whaaat!) or actually work for a living <gasp!> Harry chooses to work and runs a successful publishing enterprise.

She: Emmaline Dove is the quiet, spinsterish, plain, humorless secretary who keeps Harry on schedule and is the silent force behind everything at the company actually getting done. She keeps working for him even when he asks her to do stuff like buy "going away presents" for the mistresses he ditches and even though she knows he's selfish and a faithless rake, because he is fair minded enough to pay her what he would pay a male secretary, and because she dreams of one day being able to publish her own book.

Conflict: He never wants to get married again because of a whole thing with his previous wife who was in love with someone else and ran off and now he's scarred for life and feels guilty for subjecting his family to the stigma of his divorce. There's some sexual chemistry between Harry and Emma, they embark on an affair, he unveils the hedonist beneath her starchy, repressed exterior, she knows he's a love-em-and-leave-em kinda guy but she falls for him anyway, he skirts the issue of commitment until there's a whole Grand Gesture event (which wasn't that grand, honestly - he bought her a bunch of books) and boom they live happily ever after.

Basically the plot of Any Romantic Comedy Ever. But this wasn't really that funny. It was just sort of obvious and un-funny. And I found Emma incredibly tiresome and unsympathetic. She just caved. Like in 2 seconds under his smoldering gaze, she CAVED and gives everything up. It just felt like all her snippy attitude and sense of independence and moralizing were nothing more than a cloak to hide her sexual frustration. She didn't really seem to have a personality except "sexually frustrated spinster" and then when she finally gives it up (and oh, of course HE'S the one who is responsible for all this flowering and passion, right? Honestly, it could have been ANY DUDE, she was THAT wound up) she's all hedonistic and sexual. Please. 

Anyway, the writing wasn't bad. I mean, I liked it but I wasn't transported. Maybe I was in a bad mood because I thought she was lame and he was a selfish jerk and I just hit a wall. As I said, not my cup of tea.

But I leave you with the trailer of Hysteria which WAS my cup of tea. Really funny tea.

Kiss the Girl by Susan Sey

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

The cover of this book really threw me for a loop. It suggests that the story would be one of those cutesy rom coms featuring a strong silent hero, a chattery but adorable heroine, a strict father figure with a heart of gold, a gay best friend and an eternally single and hilariously bitter bff. 

And I was wrong because despite what the cutie-patootie cover suggests, this story is the total opposite of that.

He: Heart surgeon who volunteers his time with the poor and downtrodden of D.C.'s rougher neighborhoods. Along with his best friend Mary Jane, he helps run a clinic to help the poor get access to healthcare.

She: A famous trust fund-rich do-gooder from a family of famous do-gooders who has spent her whole life in the poorest parts of the world trying to bring attention to the plight of the people there. Her mother is described as an Angelina Jolie-type of character with an almost brutal beauty and the ability to turn everyone who beholds her into a whimpering fool. Our heroine on the other hand is more of a Princess Di sort with a sweetness and charm that ingratiates her to anyone she meets. Her life has  been charmed in terms of wealth and public adoration, but she's a lonely girl at the heart of it. Plus she has a nasty and dysfunctional family.

Conflict: The hero's mother is a senator and he always resented the fact that she was never there for him and his father. He is determined never to marry someone who was so much in the public eye that it would preclude any sort of true private life. So when H meets h, although there is some attraction, he feels like her intensely public profile means that he can never really get into a relationship with her.

Liked:
1) Interesting premise and probably not too far off the mark as far as how the media affects people's private lives. 

2) The story wasn't as "soft" as your typical chick-lit novel. There were some rather serious issues being dealt with here - poverty in America, the abominable state of the healthcare system, the responsibility of the rich to lend the poor some of their luck, how the media both manipulates and is manipulated by people in the spotlight - among others.

3) The writing was snappy and many times funny, and the characters were really nicely drawn. They were all complicated and tricky and not at all the regular characters who usually pop up in chick-lit.

What was sort of meh:
1) I thought the hero was an ass. The big stick up his heinie was that his mommy was too busy for him (um hello, she was a senator, his dad could have moved his saggy butt to where his mom worked instead of insisting she leave her job and ambitions to come work on his farm). 

As a result of this feeling of abandonment, his whole problem with the heroine is that she's "too famous" to be a suitable wife and partner. Why? As a thinking adult, could he not open his eyes and see that being famous and busy isn't the real issue - the issue is what that person does with their fame and work. And once he gets to know her and realizes that she ISN'T a spoiled brat, then what is his issue with her? 

I really just didn't get why he let his dislike for the fact that he felt like his mom didn't bake him cookies when he was little color his whole entire perspective on Every Famous Female in the World.

2) There is a scene where he forces her to eat meat even though she says she's a vegetarian because he doesn't believe she's a vegetarian for "the right reasons". Say what now!!?? Who the heck is HE to tell her what the "right" reasons are. 

Her reasons were actually pretty sound - she thinks the meat industry is extremely energy intensive and thought she would do her little part in cutting back on the waste. That isn't the worst reasoning I've ever heard. But he insists that she eat a burger. Turns out she likes it and he feels all vindicated and smug. Well... the fact that burgers are DELICIOUS is not really in dispute here - it's just that even though they are delicious a person has a right to choose not to eat them if they feel like they are doing something to cut back a little on the general excess. 

Whatever. 

3) He asks his best friend to marry him even though he doesn't really love her that way two SECONDS after he finishes making out with the girl that he does like that way.

Skeptic's last word: Ok - it occurs to me that everything I dislike about this book has to do with the hero. So I guess that's that then. If you don't mind douche-y, bitter, antagonistic heroes then this is the book for you! I do like Ms. Sey as a writer though so I will try something else of hers to get the taste of this silliness out of my mouth.

Here Comes the Groom by Karina Bliss

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

I've been on a Australasia binge lately! A lot of Karina Bliss and Sarah Mayberry. Fun stuff. 

So... I liked this one okay. 

There was something about the friends-to-lovers thing that didn't really strike me as believable in this one. I know friends-to-lovers is a popular theme for many romance readers, but I don't really like them because I feel like it gives more ammunition to the side of the world that believes that girls and boys can't be friends - something I absolutely do not accept and do not believe at all.

In this case, H & h have been friends since childhood and there has been no hint of a romantic interest between the two of them that whole time. Well, except for this one tiny kiss they share when she's drunk and lonely. 

Then he comes back from a traumatic experience while fighting in Afghanistan and announces he wants to marry her.

He: Ex-soldier, insists that 'everything is fine' but we sense that he's going through some terrible stress. And even though he's always been a good friend to her, he's kept himself apart. 

She: She's a strong, independent, competent lady. She's always been capable of taking care of her own affairs and has never played the damsel in distress with him - something that he has said he truly appreciates. But then when she goes through this terrible stressful situation, she feels like she shouldn't really burden him with her crap, especially since he's clearly been affected by the war and she doesn't want to add to that.

Conflict: This is the part that felt a bit "off kilter" to me. I see why the would be a good match, but how come they never saw it all those years they were friends. And then, I wasn't quite sure how they each SUDDENLY knew this was the right decision? I guess in life, people don't necessarily have a seminal moment that explains everything they do, but surely they had hints? 

Anyway so the story conflict is that when she does realize she loves him, she wants them to marry for the right reasons, not because they are both too scared of life. 

There is some weird stuff right at the end where he goes through this whole "Grand Gesture" that is supposed to prove that they are meant to be together - that they are both facing their fears and taking real risks to be with one another. But honestly, I really didn't get it. The main trouble for me was that the gesture didn't really seem to be tied to their actual fears - except maybe in a distantly symbolic way.

Skeptic's last word: So. All in all, a decent read, but I thought the "falling in love" stuff was really rather abrupt and there was none of the regular tension built up between them that would convince me that they really wanted each other. I came away feeling like they were both kind of just "settling" for their best friend. Not a terrible way to begin a relationship, of course, just not really the way you'd hope.

The Return of Rafe McKade by Nora Roberts

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

I was literally JUST talking about the change in the alpha hero landscape from the Old School variety to this 2.0 modified alpha version. I had this whole argument for the new, more sensitive, nice-guy version and then I re-read this book! I am feeling all nostalgic for the Old School types again...sigh.

Anyway - quick run down of the salient plot points.

He: One of 4 bad-boy brothers in a small town who blazed out of town years ago because he was restless and felt like he needed to get out (or punch something, which he incidentally does, a LOT). Now he's back - still too hot to handle, but also successful and wealthy and too pretty for his own good. 

He takes one look at her and like a roaming African boy wildebeest who sees the glistening hindquarters of his perfect girl wildebeest, he goes - her, I'll take her. And it's on.

She: A recent import to the small town so she didn't know his bad boy self when he was growing up and gets to see it all fresh for the first time when he comes rolling back to his hometown after his self-imposed exile. Lucky ducky. She's running an antique store and he hires her to furnish the property he's restoring now that he's back in town. She's determined not to become her mother (traditional, husband-serving, personality-less) so she's not keen to have him overwhelm her better judgement and tries to keep aloof.

Conflict: He blows hot and strong and it's all a bit much for her so she tells him to dial it back a bit. He obviously does the opposite (because dude, he's a MAN) and pretty soon they're humping like bunnies in the old haunted property he's trying to restore. He spends a lot of time announcing his wicked intentions to her. And warning everyone else to back off of HIS woman. She does an admirable job of keeping him er, civilized, but his manliness and need to protect her finally overwhelms her better sense and she gracefully succumbs. Good old fashioned romance, in other words.

Skeptic's last word: I mean... this is an OLD book (1995s, I think) - but still manages to be a hoot to read. The is PLENTY of sillysauce in the book (he seems to prefer resolving conflict like a hormonal 16 year old - bar fights and gorilla chest-thumping - and channels all sexual frustration into some black, black moods.) But somehow, I didn't mind at all. Nora Roberts entertained and charmed and it was all just a sweet, sometimes hot experience. 

It made me miss the Old School alphas of yore. "Yore" being 1995 apparently. Good times.

A Lady By Midnight by Tessa Dare

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

This book started at a 4-5 ♥ for me and sort of held there for the first 2/3rds of the book. I was thrilled and prepared to settle in for a nice Sunday Funday of just me, Tessa and a bottle of something cheap and red! But THEN. Oooooh then. Well, I'm sorry to have to tell you that the last third just stretched my patience a LITTLE too far and just brought the whole thing down to an average of 3 ♥. Sigh.

Here's the lowdown.

He: Corporal Thorne's militia unit is stationed in Spindle Cove, a quaint little seaside town inhabited by an abundance of unusual and interesting ladies. He's quiet and surly and not much of a conversationalist. We find out that he's had a wretched childhood and his taciturnity is partly a result of a lifetime of getting kicked in the cojones by Life. He's also just a reserved guy.

She: Kate is the village piano teacher. She is sweet and kind, a well-liked member of the village. Underneath her sweetness, she is masking her loneliness and an almost desperate need to find her family. She is an orphan who had the good fortune to be left at a school for girls where she was relatively well treated but she still pines to discover what she can about her own roots.

Conflict: He is wildly attracted to her, but feels so beneath her that he can't allow himself to touch her. She always feels intimidated by his dark scowls and moodiness. The main reason he won't allow himself to be near her is because he knows something about where she comes from, something bad, and that information could potentially destroy the nice little life she has built for herself. And he likes her so much he just can't bring himself to ruin everything for her no matter how much she thinks she wants to find out about her past.

So...The first bit starts out really nicely - classic Tessa Dare. Witty, sweet, fun. All the elements of a cozy love story all lined up like a bunch of yellow duckies toddling along behind their mom. The right amount of longing and lusting and broody staring. All great stuff and I was all set to 5 heart this puppy. 

But THEN... there is a series of what I shall call Hysterical Events (including an idiotic sword fight / impromptu duel at a house party, a marriage proposal from someone who is a good guy but basically needs to marry her because he needs her inheritance, the constant self-denial of the hero because he just Wants Her to Be Happy even though she keeps telling him she will be Happy Only With Him). 

And as much as I dislike hysteria perpetrated by the heroine, I equally don't like it when it's perpetrated by the hero. The hero's problem is that because of his painful childhood he feels alone and unlovable and has experienced all sorts of terrible violence. But the way he tries to do what's best for her is always this overly dramatic, operatic nonsense that leaves me feeling like "huh?" Is this a full grown man? Because he's kind of acting like a 16 year old girl...

I'm being very harsh. I know that. I did like the H. He was a really decent dude who was only trying to do what's best for her. But I feel like his insecurity just made him behave in ways that I didn't find rational or even sensible. So I didn't fall for him and that just made believing the whole HEA that much harder for me.

Anyway. Having said that, I think this was a sweet story with all the hallmarks of a good Tessa Dare read - humor, wit, some spiciness - so it wasn't a total loss. I just wished I connected with the H more.

Moonlight Road by Robyn Carr

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

Here's how it went down - H & h meet under less than auspicious circumstances, then for 20% of the book they don't appear on the same page together. Then they meet again and decide they like each other. Then they meet some more and REALLY like each other. Then there's this whole drama with his ex-wife that goes on until the last 10 pages and then H & h live happily ever after. The end.

He: Aiden is a retired ex-navy doctor who is hanging out in the small town of Virgin River while he tries to figure out what he wants to do next in his life. He's a nice guy who's just happy tooling around in the garden and hanging in the great outdoors.

She: Erin is a somewhat uptight lady who's come to "relax" in the isolated town - her first vacation in 25 years. She's an extremely hardworking lawyer who's been responsible for her younger siblings from a really young age. Now that her brother and sister are out of the house and don't really need her anymore, she's suffering a bit of empty nest syndrome.

Conflict: The romance between the Erin and Aiden is actually fairly uncomplicated but there is this whole other story of Aiden's ex-wife who creates a bunch of drama that interferes with the two of them and lends to some of the tension between Erin and Aiden.

What I liked:
1) Robyn Carr writes really NICE people. Her heroes are decent, upstanding, no-games-playing lads, and her ladies are mature and sensible so you never feel like hitting your head against the wall because of some totally stoopid thing either the H or h does. 

What was only "meh":
1) SO slow. So so so slow. I just couldn't keep my mind on the story because it just moved along like molasses in January.

2) Just too much going on at once. This is a weird thing for me to say given my point above about the SLOWNESS with which the story moved. 

Because the main romantic story of Aiden and Erin didn't really have any built-in conflict (except for the psycho stalker ex-wife) it seemed like the author sort of just piled in a bunch of side stories and entanglements that made the whole thing seem a bit too busy and scattered.

For example, one character was dealing with the inability to have more children and she and her husband were trying to work through her difficulty fully coping with that stress. Then there was the H's mother who was in a new relationship and was rediscovering herself and her interests. Then there was some story about a man with Down's syndrome and how he forms a special bond with a lady with some other disabilities. 

Carr deals with each of these relationships really sympathetically and sweetly, but honestly, I didn't see how any of it contributed to the MAIN story, which is why I was reading the book in the first place. Personal preference, I guess, but it felt like a lot of sound and fury.

Skeptic's last word: It was a sweet story, I guess. Just way too slow and I think I prefer Robyn Carr's other stories.

Dating Mr. December by Phillipa Ashley

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

Good time read. It was light and fun and did the trick for a few hours. It was well written for the most part but there was a lot of inner monologue going on in the girl's head (very little from the male POV) so it got a little noisy.

Question to self - WHY do writers like to write out every lame thought that goes through the chick's mind - Is he into me? Weally, weally, weeeallly?? What about his sordid sexual past? What about the ex-wife/girlfriend on whom he may still be hung up? Will he choose me over his career/ex/past?? 

And then there are cliches of the dude's inevitable issues...commitment phobia due to a) difficult childhood and daddy issues, b) difficult past relationship or c) he's just not a settlin' down kinda guy. But wait! what's this? This incredibly hot woman (competent and classy, but vulnerable in a way that inspires his thus far dormant protective instincts) somehow burrows her way into his hardened heart in a matter of 10 pages? what the what...

I'm being harsh and somewhat unfair to heap this criticism on this book. All the above points make their inevitable appearance of course, but Phillipa Ashley writes a decent sentence so it elevates the story safely above the sludge pile.

Anyway here's the 2 minute summary.

He: Volunteer on the local mountain rescue team (Read: burley and capable, with shoulders as wide as Russia). He's also a property developer so you know he's got some cheese.

She: City girl PR consultant who is somewhat out of her element in the rugged outdoorness in which she finds herself. But with a nice hunk of burnin' love by her side...

Conflict: Mainly the tension drew from the fact that each has relationship hang ups due to past disasters and neither wants a repeat performance of what they have previously experienced. There is some head-butting initially because in her PR work with the mountain rescue team she makes some proposals that he totally hates (having all the men pose for a Mr. December calendar), but that stuff is all for show. The real tension is the backstory stuff about their pasts. Nothing new here. We get it. He doesn't want commitment, she doesn't want to get cheated on again.

Skeptic's last word: All in all a decent read. I like brit romances. There is something a little different about the tone that I do like to read once in a while so I'd recommend this if you just wanted some time-pass fun for a few hours and didn't feel inspired by your existing To Read list.

I Do (But I Don't) by Cara Lockwood

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

She: Junior wedding planner with a terrible hag of a boss

He: Firefighter

Conflict: Hmmm... not really sure it was a conflict. More like a "omg, I really like him, does he like me too?" Cue: series of misunderstandings that keep H & h apart for much of the story.

What I liked:
1) This is the exact kind of book publisher blurbs call "beach reads" and that's exactly what it was - lighthearted, easy peasy fun where I didn't have to think too hard

2) This is a weird thing to call out, but I really liked the fact that the story was set in a city other than NYC/LA or Generic Small Town in the Heartland. Instead, it was set in Austin, Texas - a nice sized, interesting city that we don't get to see all that often in these books. The NYC/Generic Small Town thing always leads to these caricatures of Big Bad City Gal/Perfect Wonderful Heartland Folk that have begun to really irritate me. And the Big City romances always show this bitch/career woman pairing that I find tiresome and unfair to career woman, nay ALL women. So this was nice.

3) First person was used well. You get enough of an idea about the H because of their conversations and we were not at all left in the dark about his motives, wants and hopes. It was generally entertaining to get to see the romance unfold through her eyes. Having said that though, I need to mention that Kristen Higgins does such an amazing job of first person that everyone else's looks like watery porridge next to hers. Still it wasn't terrible.

What was meh:
1) What would you think if I told you that this was a story about a wedding planner who has a crush on this dude but it looks like she might be planning his wedding thereby making their love impossibly impossible? 

Right? Obviously. J-to-the-Lo co-opted this story and even if this book came out before the movie did (not sure if it did), the inescapable truth is that this is the image that popped into my mind the second I figured she was a wedding planner. Unfortunately, my regard for Ms. Lopez does not extend to her acting skills, so this was a terribly unfortunate image lurking around in the background.

2) You can't base an entire story on a series of misunderstandings. You just can't. I think readers just want more. When the entire "conflict  can be solved with a single conversation/voicemail, I feel like it's a little silly that the Scooby Doo stuff continues for so long. 

*Spoiler* In "I Do (But I Don't)" it's cute in the beginning but then the h & H spend a whole weekend together and it never once comes up that "hey pretty lady, I'm not the one getting married, here's my deal and we're free to get it on?" *End of Spoiler*

Lack of communication is bad for relationships. Dr. Phil would be so disappointed.

3) I thought it was weird but cool but then weird again that the hero is described as being Too Good To Be True (and what did our mom's tell us about things that look too good to be true?) Turns out that this hot, amazing dude is also SUPER nice is because he used to be fat. Oh, I know it doesn't say that explicitly! It's more like the h wondering, hmm HOW COME this guy is so awesome? And then she find out this fact about his prior chunkiness and then it all makes sense and she's like oooooh, he must be for real then. 

Shorthand way of saying he's nice because he was insecure once and doesn't inflict that shit on anyone else. You see? It's nice. But kind of also weird.

Final word: Nice, time pass book, with some amusing bits and and ok setting/premise. Just be warned that it's pretty heavy on the cliched storylines and characters, but I didn't hate myself after reading it.

Bound by Your Touch by Meredith Duran

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

He: James is the rakish heir to the Earl of Moreland whose sole aim in life is to infuriate his father in order to "punish" him for this terrible thing his father did in the past. James never forgives his father for abandoning his sister during her most difficult time because of the Earl's obsession with being dignified in the eyes of society. 

She: Lydia is a proper, spinsterish miss who for lack of a "better" occupation (i.e. marriage) is her father's right hand man in his business affairs in the trade of Egyptian antiquities. She doesn't seem to have any special passion for antiquities for all she writes papers about them, but she does do her duty to her father admirably.

Conflict: Both H & h are loyal to a fault. Lydia is loyal to her father, despite the fact that he basically abandons her and her sisters to hare off to Egypt to dig up artifacts. James is loyal to his sister even when it means ruining his relationship with his father, ruining his own reputation in society and generally living with his sweltering bitterness and guilt. 

Eventually both are made to see that loyalty and faith, while excellent attributes, cannot be given indiscriminately. Lydia and James each need to give up a little of their stubbornness in order to face reality and finally learn to be happy.

What I liked: 
1) I liked the psychological complications of relationships between fathers and their children. It shows how those initial key relationships with one's father/mother teach people to love and trust in future relationships. When those initial relationships go wrong, it can have devastating effects on the person's ability to really achieve true peace of mind until they resolve the conflicts with their own families.

In the story, it is imperative for both Lydia and James to achieve some sort of closure with their respective fathers before they can truly be free to forge a new, healthy relationship with one another. I appreciated the fact that the author didn't try to resolve everything with a pretty ribbon at the end, but left in a little of the messiness that a real life family with internal troubles might have.

2) The writing was amazing. Sometimes. 
MD would write these beautifully complicated sentences, witty dialogue and some lovely, wrenching internal character monologues, and then she would have a sentence like "you, sir, are a cad!" Huh? Seems a little trite, no? Then there were these awful, awful, awful American-isms ("bully for you") that just made me wince. And many times characters refer to James as "Viscount" rather than "My lord". There should be a proper editor who edits this kind of stuff out. I mean, I know it's not THAT big a deal, but if you're writing a period book, why not just treat the topic with respect and do it properly?

Anyway, MD is clearly a wonderful writer. But I thought this was only good when it could have been edited to be superb.

What I grew super annoyed with:
1) Lydia spends a whole lot of the book chastising the poor man for being a "cad", being useless, being a rake, being a bad son etc etc. Get over it, lady. It was especially annoying because she seems to go overboard criticizing him because she herself is such an insecure bundle of nerves (she's insecure about her looks, her standing in society, her desirability). And anyway, who was she to criticize someone so roundly? She was plenty damaged herself.

2) Although everything was really well written, I felt like the internal monologue just went on and on and ON. There were some points where one character would say something, and before the other responds there would be 3 PAGES of internal monologue - so I had pretty much forgotten what the last bit of dialogue even was by the time the other person responds. 

3) Throwaway secondary characters. Lydia's sisters, James' friend Phin and certain other secondary characters are mentioned, play some role in the story and then sort of just disappear. We don't get a sense of the "world" Lydia and James live in because we don't really know the people in their world. We know a lot about their relationships with their respective fathers, but very little about their relationships with other people. Even Lydia's relationship with her sisters seem a bit two-dimensional. All I know is that one sister sucks and one is nice. And that's about it. MD probably set it up that way to write other books about these other characters, but I thought their roles were a bit unsatisfying in this particular book.

Skeptic's last word: I think MD is a super writer - she seems to be someone I would normally love reading. I am going to pick up another of her books to see if I perhaps just picked wrong this time since this seemed to miss somewhat with me. 

Getting Over It by Anna Maxted

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

In Getting Over It, Anna Maxted reminds us that the Brits, as a people, are hilarious. And even though I had some issues with this book, it cannot be denied that I laughed out loud so many times that the lady sitting next to me in Starbucks inched away and gave me a look reserved for the homeless dude who stares at the 2% milk carafe and talks to it all day.

Many, many more sour candy tidbits like these:

"...it'll be as awkward as sex in a bath. Your stomach bunches up and the aesthetics are ruined."

"I fed the hunger on a gluttonous diet of pre-1970s Harlequin romances."

"If we always made the smartest choices, we'd never get laid."

"I am dumping Jasper tomorrow. He deserves it for being called Jasper, for a start."

I struggled with this. 4 hearts because it was hilariously funny and there was a LOT going on (death in the family, serious trouble in a close friend's life, many hits and misses with some foolish men, anxiety at work, tumult with roommates, a sick cat at home)? Or 3 because the heroine acts like a serious wanker in every single one of her dealings with the hero and through all the other challenges in her life. Methinks 3.

She: A 26-year old lowly employee of a girly magazine who shares many of the manifold amusements one would expect of a young, hot City gal. She hangs with her friends and bitches about men, goes out and gets sozzled on a semi-regular basis, fails to save money, makes terrible decisions with men, and loves her cat. 

It's all plodding along swimmingly until her father dies.Then, suddenly, the depression, anger and her complicated Daddy-issues seem to attack from within. For half the book she is a viperishly angry creature and the other half she's a sodden lump of despair and  a BAD-DECISION MACHINE.

He: A vet. Hot. Sweet. Jolly-humored. Kind to her cat. Good in bed. Polite to her family. Takes the higher road with rude characters. Just a good dude. A little beta.

Story: There's no plot exactly. It's more of a story of how she needs to come to terms with her issues with her parents and how she must untangle the gnarly mess of her other romantic and platonic relationships.

The main thing stopping me from loving this is the fact that my main concern wasn't addressed and that is: WHY DOES THIS DUDE EVEN LIKE HER?

By the end of the book, she does some reflection and learns a few things so yes, at THAT point, I can see why he might think she's ok. But until that point? She's a HOT MESS for the entire book!!! Even the reconciliation scene was a sticky, icky bowl of day old chili. There are far too many misunderstandings (all caused by this crazy woman) and I can't believe that a guy wouldn't just be like, alright lady, ENOUGH already!

There is not one instance where she helps HIM out. She seems totally self involved (obsessed) and up her own arse. I understand that it's because she's going through a tough phase, but if the tough phases of life reveal what type of person we're dealing with, then here, we are dealing with an overgrown brat. She doesn't seem to have a nice, kind bone in her body. When she does do something nice, it's with some resentment and bitterness. Except for the thing with her friend. That was all good. But I can't say what it is because it was the one "surprising" thing in the book. 

Can we all just agree that there is NO person who will agree to take on such a garbage heap of unresolved emotion unless they were already in a relationship with them. It just defies everything that I observe to be true.

Skeptic's last word: Annnnnyyyyway... the book is funny. Hilarious, even. But it didn't QUITE pass the Skeptical smell test as an actual, believable romance. But who cares right? It was a fun read and that's all you need sometimes.

Rescuing Rose by Isabel Wolff

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

Rescuing Rose was definitely well-written and sometimes charming. But I thought the story has been told a thousand times before in sort of the same way (woman loses everything husband, job, home, security) and romantic interest seemed a little 2-dimensional.

My main issue with the lead character is that she seemed like a controlling, emotionally constipated, angry shrew some of the time and I found her a bit difficult to like. I guess she comes across that way because her character feels abandoned and insecure, but while I sympathized, I just never grew to like her. She spends her whole life trying to get into other people's problems (she's an agony aunt for a newspaper) so she doesn't have to deal with her own, which I thought was a little too obvious of a characterization. And then, even while "helping" people, she comes across as snappish and rude, rather than actually warm and empathetic to the troubles of her "clients".

I liked the angle of the adoption of the main character as a baby and how that affects her whole outlook on life, but I felt that her issues sort of just go on and on and the "Resolution" seemed a little too perfectly packaged to be believable. Just feels like this woman should have taken herself to therapy years ago!

I also appreciated the fact that the character is 40 and Ms. Wolff didn't make the story into a whole Must Have Baby Now thing. Thank goodness for that.

The romantic interest seemed very underdeveloped as a character. You learn a few things about who he is and what he does, but even at the end of the book, I feel like I didn't really grow to love him because I just didn't know WHY he was attracted to her in the first place.

Skeptic's last word: This was an ok read. I would save it for a "slow" reading time. Like if you're between some heavy books and just need a palate cleanser. I think it was a little light on the "romance" angle, but it dealt sympathetically with a character whose issues revolve around feelings of inadequacy and abandonment.

All He Ever Dreamed by Shannon Stacey

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

You know that feeling when you are on your first date with this guy that you're totally into and everything is going fine - he doesn't have gunk in his teeth during dinner, he has good manners, you share a few laughs - but then when it's all over you're like "Huh. That was...nice"? You know that feeling? Well, that's where I am right now.

First, a quick story review and then I will try and explain why I'm not calling my best friend up and giddily rhapsodizing about my hot new date.

He: Josh Kowalski - the youngest brother of the Kowalski clan - is sick of holding the bag of familial responsibility for the running of the Northern Star Lodge. He's been sick of it for ages and is just waiting for the chance to get out of there as soon as the opportunity presents itself.

She: Katie Davis has practically grown up with the Kowalski family and has been best friends with Josh since they were little. She's always been one of the guys and even though she's harbored a secret longing for him to notice her as a girl, they've remained close.

Conflict: He's desperate to get away from what he sees as his "noose" and lack of life choices - running the family-owned lodge himself after the death of his father has meant he hasn't really had the opportunity to build a life for himself anywhere else. He's resentful and frustrated by the smallness of his life and just wants out. Even when he realizes he is attracted to Katie, he still feels like he needs to go out into the world to discover what he really wants.

What I was troubled by:

1) The hero was basically a huge whiny baby

I appreciated that Josh was very rightly resentful that he was the only one in the family who bore the responsibility of running the business, and can easily understand how he would be keen to get out of that rut. But he doesn't really seem to have any other passions to fall back on, so the way I see it, if you don't have a plan to do anything you love, you may as well do something useful. 

He goes on and on about how he needs to break free to go forth and discover what he wants to do, he doesn't want it to be imposed upon him. That sounds like something a whiny 5 year old would say. Everyone has stuff imposed upon them! If you really have some burning desire to DO something - say you want to play professional sports, or you are an artists or writer, or you want to be a doctor or design buildings - wouldn't that desire translate into actions taken from the minute you realize you have them. 

And ok, if you were unlucky enough to never have left the 20 square miles around your hometown for 30 years and didn't have a clue what you wanted to do, and all you knew is you didn't want to be doing THIS, wouldn't you just say, ok guys, I'm taking a gap year. I need to travel and clear my head. It's going to be expensive but you're all going to just have to suck it up and or you guys should just pitch in with a little help.

To do something about his unhappiness that didn't involve categorically rejecting everything would have required maturity that this guy didn't seemed like he possessed. It just seemed like the attitude of someone who was 22 - not really an adult of 30.

Not hot.

2) The heroine was more like his mom than his partner.

There was a lot about how Josh and Katie had been bffs since childhood. But their entire relationship seems to be based on talking about football and hockey and her fielding grunted, emotionally constipated responses from him and then cracking a joke to neutralize the tension so he wouldn't get too wound up. Poor baby.

He just comes across as a child and she as a mature adult who constantly needs to give him space, and time, and whatever else kids in a funk need.

Also, not hot.

3) Guy Sees Outline of Cold Nipple and Gets An Epic Hard-on That Just Won't Go Away. 

It MUST be love.

Have you guys seen this before? Guy feels nothing but chummy brotherhood with this girl - his best pal, like forever, but then one day, he gets an eyeful of cold nips and ba-BOOM, he's 30 floors up Erection Tower in Lust City in the express elevator. Puhleese. 

First of all, if he's a guy and they've been friends through his hormonal adolescence, even if nothing happened, he'd have noticed the outline of her parts waaaaay before now. And secondly, there is this out-sized reaction to a dress that makes him want to rip it off her post haste and have his way with her over a table NOW. Sure. She's one of the guys and you never see her like that, and now she looks feminine and nice and it's INEVITABLE that you'll feel an interest, right? Julia Roberts wore that hooker dress that was arguably ASKING to be ripped off but Richard Gere managed to keep it in his pants the entire evening. Are you asking me to believe that this woman looks SO amazing in a basic black number than this guy gets an unmanageable woody that can not be held back unless he has sex with her Right. This. Second. That he basically spends like 30 pages (like days) of the book "distracted' and in a state of semi-arousal? 

I love stories of guys being hilarious dummies as much as the next girl, but if this condition could even be physically possible, I shudder to think how little blood flow was being directed to the poor man's brain. No wonder he was irritable and moody all the time.

What was nice:

1) Just the right dollop of torturous anguish

Weirdly, I thought the most romantic part of the story - and basically what saved the whole thing for me - was their phone conversations when they "break up". By this point they know they love each other, and they understand why the other is doing what they're doing, and they know they're just prolonging their anguish by keeping in touch, but they do it anyway because they can't help it. That was so sweet.

2) No cheapo plot device to raise the stakes 

Often, when the characters need to be made to See The Light, the author will introduce a new entanglement like a second male character who makes the hero jealous and drives him back to her like a raging papa bear protecting his mating rights. Luckily, Ms. Stacey is too smart for that. Because those are super lame.

Skeptic's last word: So yeah... would I do on a date with this again? Nah. Not a re-read or anything. But it was a nice way to spend a few hours.

Midnight in the Garden of Good and Evie by Marianne Stillings

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

He: Detective investigating the murder of a wealthy, eccentric old novelist. The murdered guy was also the H's step-father.


She: The ward of the murdered author who  loved her guardian, even though he had apparently been a difficult person.

Note: H - Hero, h - heroine

Conflict: H hated the old novelist because he had been the cause of some childhood trauma involving his mother. Turns out that the murdered guy "knew" he was going to get killed by someone so he sets up a "treasure hunt" for a few chosen guests to figure out who the murderer is. The H & h are on the same team as they try and figure out the mystery from the clues the old man leaves behind. Their divergent opinions of the dead old dude keep H&h on opposing sides.

The mystery is set up as a "whodunnit" treasure hunt where the winner who figures out who the murderer is gets all the dead man's money. H&h are on the same team and must work together to figure out who committed the murder. 

This is not a terribly mysterious mystery but it was generally funny, maybe a little hammy, sometimes even sitcom-y humor, but a decent read. 

It Happened One Midnight by Julie Anne Long

Skeptic Scale: ♥♥♥

Huh. What shall I say about this book that won't seem make me seem like a totally demanding d!ckhead. First of all, this was a good read. Julie Anne Long is obviously an amazing writer and the Pennyroyal Green series is a winner. But like the totally demanding d!ckhead that I am, I just wanted MORE. 

I mean, first of all, I was all disappointed by the fact that this wasn't the big Lyon/Olivia story that I have been waiting for for ages and ages (JAL and George R.R. Martin are KILLING me with all this SUSPENSE. I BEG you both to put me out of my misery already.) 

And second, I thought that maybe this particular story had a bit less uniqueness and knock-you-knickers-off-ness than the others did and that could be why I'm having such a hard time articulating why it missed slightly with me. 

He: Jonathan Redmond, the youngest son of the famed Redmond family of Pennyroyal Green. No one really expects much of him - not his father, the business-obsessed Isiah Redmond, not his siblings and not his friends in the ton. But Jonathan does have passion and interests outside wagering and gadding about Society. He has a knack for investing in good ideas - it's just that he doesn't always have the money to do it.

She: Thomasina, or Tommy, is the bastard daughter of a Duke, she had a tragic life but has scrapped and saved and has managed to build a place for herself in Society. It's a fragile foothold, to be sure, but she's determined to cling to it and to build the thing she wants most - a family.

Conflict: Tommy needs a wealthy, titled man to marry her and give her his name and to finally give her the respectability she's never really had. Jonathan doesn't have a title or wealth making him the exact opposite of what she wants. His father has also decreed that Jonathan must get married to a respectable lady of good breeding within 6 months or he loses what money he does receive in his allowance. Tommy is the exact opposite of respectable and not at all someone Jonathan can think of pursuing. Nothing seems to align for them and they know it.

My take:
1) I wish the hero was more "tortured" by his decision to follow his heart. 

I'm not a sadist or anything, but I like there to be some tension in the lead up to when H & h eventually get together. I want it to feel like the odds are so hugely against them, the risk of choosing each other is so fraught with peril that there is always the chance that they won't get to be together. Even though these are romance novels and I KNOW the ending, I want to feel like that ending is in mortal danger of never happening. I want to feel weak with relief when the HEA does happen for them. Dramatic much? Hells yeah...

Here, it just felt like both knew what they felt for each other early on. Jonathan's character was painted like this noble nice guy so that you already KNOW what his attitude to his father's ultimatum would be. I wasn't ever in doubt of his actions. Or hers.

2) I'm so over Good Guys - give me a leeeetle bad.

The hero is the classic Good Guy. He has a superhero complex and feels the need to save everyone, he's nice to children and ladies, he's an affable friend etc etc. I feel like I read this characterization a LOT. I would love to believe these Good Guy types actually exist but remain unconvinced. I wish there was a way to make a REGULAR person, one who doesn't naturally act like a saint and risk bodily harm to save others, be heroic. I wish he was even a little bad. Or regular even. At least that way I can pretend such a hero could actually exist somewhere in this big bad world. 

Speaking of Good Guys. I wouldn't have minded if this heroine was a little less tragically wonderful. I mean, she's like a lollipop. All unrelenting charm and sweetness. 

She got a superhero complex of her own and in spite of all the crappy things that happen to her growing up, she still has this fresh naivete and delightful innocence about her? C'mon. The last scene in the Epilogue made me roll my eyes even though it was supposed to show how she was such a dignified and magnanimous person in spite of being wronged by life. People don't work that way! Or maybe I'm just a huge jerk.

There were some other issues I had, but basically I thought the story was a bit blah and I kept feeling this deja vu, because honestly I feel like I have read the story of ruined-bastard-daughter-comes-up-in-the-world-relying-on-her-wits-and-incomparable-beauty-and-in-spite-of-the-tragedy-of-her-own-life-seeks-to-save-others-from-similar-fate-while-attaining-saintly-aura-of-untouchable-innocence. Nyeeeeh. 

I read somewhere that the next one in the Pennyroyal series is about Ian Eversea. Aaarrrgh. Shoot me nowwwwww. Give me Olivia and Lyon dammit. Although when I've calmed down I won't be that crushed about Ian's story - I like that guy in the other books so fine. I'll wait even LONGER for Olivia/Lyon. Waiting even longer for their story won't raise my expectations or anything...

Falling Star by Diana Dempsey

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥
The story about an aging news anchor is something you might see on tv - a romantic comedy starring Michelle Pfeiffer in the role of a woman's who Had It All but then swiftly Lost It All because of circumstances outside of her control - the media's obsession with youth, a dog of an ex-husband, a scheming upstart seeking to usurp her position as lead anchorwoman. 

The love interest, her agent, would be played by a younger man. I'm thinking Bradley Cooper because he needs to be able to be lawyer-ly and comforting but not take away the attention from our leading lady.

What say you? They look good together, right!? What am I even saying... Either Michelle or Bradley would look amazing cast beside a side of mutton. Anyway, I still think there's something nice going on here:

Once I had the visuals in my mind, I was more able to enjoy the story - because honestly, it was kind of sad reading about how this woman - capable, terrific at her job - just lost it all because she's not 25 and bang-able any more. I know, it's reality and I know it happens all the time, but it just reminded me that it TOTALLY SUCKS. So I made the whole thing into a romantic comedy in my head so I wouldn't feel so miserable.

Anyway, story was well written - it was not written as a comedy (that was a made-up defense mechanism thing, as I explained). The protagonist stayed in character the whole time - that is, she is described as a tough, focused career-woman and she stayed that way the whole time - she doesn't just turn into a leaky faucet who needs a dude to save her when everything unravels. She loses her mind a little, does a few crazy things, but they were all in the quest to rebuild her life.

The romantic angle in the book could have been beefed up a little - they didn't spend a lot of time together so I didn't feel the build-up. The guy has been her agent for years (it felt a little icky, he's been earning a bunch of money off her that whole time) and they are friends at first. Also, he's kind of dating someone else - almost married in fact (he's 37, it's time). So when they hook up - well, that's cheating, my friends! I definitely felt less sympathy for both characters at that point - he was kind of a jerk to carry on with his fiancee even after his stumble into bed with the h. Which makes him no better than the h's ex-husband - he was a cheating b@stard too! 

We'd re-write that whole part in the Michelle/Bradley movie, obviously.

Anyway, it all works out in the end. She manages to save her career with some audacious moves on her part and some luck. There was satisfying closure. The ex-husband was appropriately punished, the exec who was trying to push her out for a younger model was disgraced and the young, vampy upstart received her comeuppance. Boom. She wins and proves she can Have It All. Take that, world. 

You Only Love Twice by Lori Wilde

Skeptic scale: ♥♥♥

He: NCIS investigator and former SEAL is running surveillance on his neighbor who is suspected of being mixed up in some sort of political intrigue involving terrorism and secret Navy conspiracies 

She: Illustrator of the comic series featuring Angelina Avenger, sassy crime-fighting superhero, and the h's alter ego

Conflict: Oh, the tangled web of deceit and subterfuge! I can't go through the exact conflict or I'll give away the whole plot but I will say that there are many twists and turns including the following:
a) An accusation of treason that involves state secrets about weapons and terrorists
b) A hit man who is looking to cap the h in her pretty little head
c) A high speed car chase where, despite getting shot at and almost killed, both H&h are overcome by the need for sexy-times. Um, duh!... wouldn't YOU?

The goods:
1) The character development of both H&h was pretty good. I liked how the h would have full conversations with her alter ego, and how Angelina, the super hero would goad the h into doing brave/reckless things.

2) The conversation was fun and flirty and the build up was nicely paced

The weirds:
1) There is a point where it seems as though the h's mom has been killed by the baddies. It was extremely weird to see how she manages to get turned on and wanting to jump the H's bones THAT SAME EVENING. Show some respect, woman! I mean, you can control yourselves for ONE evening, right? Not even to mourn the passing of the woman who gave birth to you?

2) There was a whole "Bourne Identity"-like set up with terrorists, corrupt government representatives, conspiracy theories that turn out to be real - but then the end is a neat little package where everyone is connected to everyone else and all the baddies were horrible and all the goodies, self-sacrificing saints.